It’s hard to explain to a person who hasn’t experienced it before, how debilitating our inner critic is. I actually believe that there isn’t a “gift” that “creative” people have, but it’s instead the people who can silence their inner critic, and those who can’t. Those who can silence that dark voice inside of themselves, will allow the time and development from practice to help develop a skill. Yes, I’m one of those people who believes that anyone can be a great artist, if only they dedicate time to it.
So when I have these spells where I don’t create much, I only have my inner critic to blame.
The inner critic is a terrible demon that I have written about before. As I have gotten older, and further away from the creative environment that I had established in school, the easier it has become to giving into this critic.
This time, it was all because of this blog. Yep, I’ve been missing for two weeks because I was having angst about this blog. Still. The good news about all of this, is that I at least continued to work on the art journal that I established for myself back in March, so that’s something.
This all came about after listening a bunch of creative podcasts, which discussed simplifying your online presence, so you aren’t stretched thin. I played with the idea of just stopping this blog, and then moving everything to tumblr. I even started a new tumblr precisely for this purpose. Everyone was saying to make things easy on myself, which is the exact opposite of what WP is doing for me creatively. I’m so much more comfortable with tumblr than WP’s format, and that still remains true. But there’s a problem with that switch, in that tumblr wants bite sized blog entries, and that’s not always what I do. There’s also the fact that tumblr can change anytime, leaving me stuck with a format that’s obsolete, only to pick up and move again. So what choice do I make?
I am going to change the format of this site. And it’s coming soon. The new tumblr will be it’s own art posting thing. But, for know, this blog will continue to exist, but I’m still trying to figure out it what manner. There are other, much more successful art encouragement blogs. But should that mean I stop trying to write inspirational entries? Maybe I’ll only work on tutorials? But that wouldn’t be a regular post, as tutorials take several extra hours of work to produce. Maybe I should write about comic production? But that would mean actually moving forward on the project that has has beat itself into a bloody pulp against the block I have on it.
Where do I go?
So, yes, I have stumbled. And I’m trying to stand back up and find what direction I am headed.